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Well crap.

SHARS JET, a late-model VW Jetta, had a cool oval sticker to the right of the badge that read, "Save the Ta's-Ta's!" with a pink ribbon. I wish it was more visible.

Playful Beetles

Hermione has yet to introduce me to her new friend. It's a 2004/2005 model, that much I know!

Stella's Ass

She's home! and street-legal to boot. Speaking of boot, Stella has a big ass!

The Husband has "new" rims and tires coming from an eBay auction. They're stock 17's, 5 spoke retro-look. We had the same type on our 2006 Mustang GT. He's also shopping for a stereo. Stella still has the stock "Mach 460!" stereo from 11 years ago. This simply won't do!

We took her for spin last night. It was overcast, perhaps 80 degrees, and absolutely perfect for a drive in a convertible. Granted, I had my hair pulled into a ponytail to keep from eating it as it whipped about my face. We had to put up the top for the ride home though; it started sprinkling.

This weekend, Husband and Son are driving up to Ohio to give my sister-in-law our old 1986 Honda Accord. It's held together with rust and prayers to the Car Goddess. Perhaps I'll take Stella for a spin, top down, while singing (poorly) at the top of my lungs, "Baby baby baby, You are my voodoo child, my voodoo child!"

Calling all Bassett Hounds!

I thought this was adorkable! They had a Bassett Hound rescue sticker along with a "Spay and Neuter Your Pets" ribbon. I loathe support ribbons but this one had a message I can back. Plus they aren't abusing their ribbon privileges.

A Rolling Lemon Boat!

Holy smokes! This Ford LTD looks to be an early 70's specimen. It had antique tags and a laminated sign posted in the back window that read DO NOT TOUCH. But for some dumbass reason they put those silly "Dubs" rims on this fine piece of Detroit steel.

Sorry for the giant expanse of my dash. New Beetle dashes are big enough to serve a buffet.

What Does She Dig?

Sassy reports in from Florida. We don't know what SHE DIGS but it was a guy behind the wheel!

Ho shit!

The Mercedes is a werewolf!!!

Stupid Twilight books, sucking me in like they have..."sucking"! and with Jake being a werewolf/shapeshifter it just fits.

I'm Your Worst...

Get it? NIGHTMARE? Bwahahahaha! I slay me!

My car's got...

That's Hermione's back end reflected in the Curves window. I just thought it was a cool shot.

Meet Stella!

Our "New" 1997 Mustang convertible. She was named Stella by her previous owner. The Husband's been dying for a convertible, scouring the region and Craigslist, driving me nucking futz. I asked him to back off; he would know when the time and the car was (were?) right. Sure enough, Stella popped up on Craigslist yesterday and he got her today.

Stella needs some work. Her tires and rims are pathetically small. The stereo is stock. She can use a good wash and wax to make her sparkle. But hey, we paid cash and now he has the car of his dreams.

Hermione at the skater store.

Not only are we reflected but you can see the silver Beetle parked on the street.

My spleen hurts from laughing so hard.

God Prefers Nissans?

God "cynt" you to drive a Maxima? And I love the month/year stickers all askew; it just adds that playful touch!

Oo, She Sells Make-Up!

She may be successful but damn, the bitch couldn't drive that big-ass Caddy! She was in the left turn lane, I was going straight, when she came into my lane and stopped in front of me at the GREEN LIGHT!!! Argh! Luckily my Beetle has a decent-enough horn (compared to my Corolla back in the day). When we both approached the next light we got into the left turn lane. The Traffic Light Goddess blessed me with a red light and was able to snap the pearlized pink Caddy in all its glory.

Smug Alert!!!

The cloud of smug over South Park develops, and begins to combine with that of San Francisco. In a series of scenes parodying the film The Perfect Storm, McFriendly then reveals that the cloud of smug from George Clooney's 78th Academy Awards acceptance speech — which claimed that Hollywood was "ahead of the curve" on social issues — will soon drift into the center of the "super cell" and create "the perfect storm of self-satisfaction", which would heavily damage South Park and completely destroy San Francisco (much to Stan's dismay).

South Park!

Fw: Ab Fab

From my WA state friend, "Saw this in the parking lot and thought of you." awesome!

Yes You Are!

!!!OMG Squee!!!

I've seen the awesome Pink Pony on the highway. I thought, "OMG that is so CUTE!" because I'm a whore for all things pink (pink it and shrink it!). My Blackberry is pink, my iPod has a pink skin, my speakers for the iPod are pink...you get the drift. So when I saw the luscious Pink Pony at the local gym I about peed myself with excitement! So frickin' awesome it's not even funny.

Why?

To quote Elaine from Seinfeld, "don't concern yourself with me, because I'm good. I'm very good. I'm really very, VERY good."

I ain't sayin' she a....

Holy crap! This shit writes itself.

You're Going to Hell Babe

Because George Takei's gay marriage will cause this dudes divorce.

Whut?

Sorry but this one makes no sense.

Eh whateva

This specimen had oodles of Christian bumper stickers too!

Palate Cleanser

To counteract the godly Chevy from earlier today. Thank Dog!

Are you there god?

So now god is a Chevrolet? Sweet!

Bingo!

Hot doggy! I got it! Because, as you know, Jesus bought her that 7-Series BMW.

Sunrise 6/30/08

Beetle!

Old Navy parking lot.

It was a mom and daughter heading in to Old Navy as we were heading out. They commented on how cute my car is (well, she is a silver Beetle with a hot pink stripe!). When we got in the car I notice the reflection of a Harvest Moon beige convertible. Too cute!

Namaste? No, You Nasty!

As seen on City Hall Blvd going home today.

Anyway, Sassy sent me this link about road rage and bumper stickers. The author speculates there's a correlation between the number of stickers and the level of road rage one will encounter. Ha! So if this Taurus is any indication with all its yoga and peace bumper stickers, the driver is highly pissed off at the people around her* yet feels very bad about it.

*Yes, it was a woman. Sorry to say but I don't think any dude would drive around in something that girly willingly. In daylight.

The DMV allowed this?

Holy crap! I tried to get this while walking to the grocery but I was across the street. I made it a point to walk back this way (in front of the Federal Building no less!) to get this ode to oral sex. At least that's how I read it.

EDIT: Well, hell. I zoomed in on the image via my Blackberry and it says DOMN8NU...Dominating You. I much prefer my interpretation. And to think I walked right past this car! But I was giddy with the thought of a dirty, dirty plate.

Someone likes those fake teef!

I'll bet he parties like rock star behind the wheel of that bitchin' Pontiac Grand Am! Go Shawtie, it's yer burfday!

What the hell is this?

Virginia is the Land of Personalized License Plates. My friend Sassy can vouch for this! We have a variety of old tags hanging in the garage...

DVL MAN (on a beat-up Accord held together with rust)
BCH CATS (our first tag! was on a 1994 Civic)
DVL AZUL (2006 Sonic Blue Mustang GT)
FRLY ODD (my first New Beetle, a 2.Slow)
EVL PNTY (was on a 1998 Nissan Frontier, 1996 Accord, and a 2002 Passat. Husband didn't want it on the Mustang)

All three of our current vehicles have personalized tags. It's silly but hey! when personalized tags are only $10 per year why not?

With cheap tags comes cheap religion. There's a plethora of god-based tags and it drives me nuts. Nuts, I say, nuts! Yes, I'm sure GZUS was responsible for that 7-Series BMW. And PRSE GD bought you that Audi TT.

So now that I have a Blackberry and know how to use it, I'm going to post the inane license plates (mostly religious, some headscratching) I see on a daily basis. Enjoy!

No, don't think so

You can't make me!